Book Review - Sita: Now you know me by Sini Panicker

       

"Sita: Now you know me" is a beautiful story by Author Sini Panicker. Written in an easy-to-read style, Ms. Panicker's unique rendition of a familiar tale narrated by many in the past is compelling and enchanting. The book transports you into a beautiful land with its vivid descriptions. 

Narrated in Sita's voice, it presents a viewpoint that is far often ignored with the grandness and memorable moments of the Ramayana. Sita, a strong and capable princess faces innumerable struggles and survives each time with resilience and grace. Here are some of the major takeaways I had reading the book.

Author Sini Panicker

In the beginning of the book, Sita confesses her unwavering unconditional love for Lord Rama despite being banished and living in isolation for 17 years. In a world where we crave to be understood- understanding Lord Rama's duties as king is a higher level of love that is both beautiful and pure. 

In her growing up years tormented by her past, when Sita creates a beautiful place in her mind to be at - she displays a unique skill to survive and thrive.  She develops mental strength focusing on what she loves best (nature), a lesson for us all when we are feeling low ourselves. To immerse ourselves in things we enjoy.  

As an accomplished princess, with a solid plan for her future, the fallacies of youth are beautifully portrayed when Sita falls for Ram on the banks of the lake in Mithila. How true this is in modern day times when distractions can cloud the best of minds and have people stray from their goals. 

When Valmiki offers his advice to Sita before their 14-year exile into the jungles -it is again real and current. The first advise to look outward for beauty in surroundings even in the times of despair. Finding the silver lining among dark clouds is both difficult and forgotten. 

 And the second piece of advice ~ most beautiful and relevant to everyone even today. As the world battles issues with depression, finding that inner peace is beautifully depicted in the paragraph from the book below.  

Extract from "Sita: Now you know me."

It is indeed a poignant point of reflection that the first exile though much harsher was easier than her banishment into the ashram the second time. The first time, she chose to leave - to stand by the one she loved. But the second time, she was banished by the one she loved unwaveringly. 

The story from beginning to end of how Sita approaches every role of her life - as a daughter, wife, sister, and mother. She shows strength and tenacity. And finally, when she walks away from the offer to come back to Ayodhya after being exiled a second time... shows her own self-respect which is above all other roles she plays. A unique story and a unique perspective which is less often remembered. 

To all the Sitas out there, may you find inner peace, strength, resilience in your challenges. Thank-you Ms. Panicker for your unique and captivating storytelling.  The book had me teared up on more than one occasion!  And that is exactly what one looks for in a good movie or a good book. A story that moves you. A story that teaches you something new. 

  

Hail O Women, who Persevered!

Hail O Women, who Persevered!

                                                    ~ Lin Thomas

Rosa, when you sat on that bus 

You knew it would create a ruckus

You took that step, though risky it seemed

Hail O Women, who followed your dream

Ruth, you championed for women everywhere

Having-it-all is not a myth, we are now aware 

You persevered when shadows were cast

Hail O Women, that paved the way in the past

Victoria, you ran to be president, when we couldn't vote 

Gloria, your words we take note! 

Unconventional ways, not so sublime

Hail O Women, ahead of their time!

Susan, the flames of voting rights you fanned 

And Kamala is now VP of the Land

No matter which political view you preach 

Hail O Women, today, the sky is peach

Maya, you rose from your struggles, learned to hope 

Lifted our spirits and taught us to cope 

Even when bleak and dreary it seemed

Hail O Women, who didn't question their dream

Bessie, you conquered the mighty sky 

Tinted it with Pink, inspired  us soar and fly

Malala, you stated education should be for all 

When challenged, you stood tall

Ada, in the 1800s, you made people rethink 

You painted STEM careers in pink

Perhaps you wondered, if it was a bad choice 

Hail O Women, who listened to their inner voice

Mothers, Sisters, Nanas, Daughters, Friends 

Untold heroes of our very own lives  

Thank-you for guiding us along the way

Hail O Women,  that inspire us each day  

References:  Rosa B Parks, Ruth Baden Ginsberg, Victoria Woodhull, Gloria Steinem, Susan B Anthony, Kamala Harris, Maya Angelou, Bessie Coleman, Malala Yousafzai,  and Ada Lovelace)

Eight life lessons from the short film ~ This book will change your Life

Motivational Speaker Amey Hegde's film -This Book Will Change your Life is an insightful, inspiring short film. Based on a real life story of a differently abled entrepreneur from Goa, India, Mr. Agostinho Fernandes, the movie has been recently released on YouTube. The movie has numerous merits like realistic dialogues and very talented performances. The film is written and directed by Ramprasad Adpaikar. The Concept for the film is by Motivational Speaker Amey Hedge who is also the film's Executive Producer.  

With a clever play in the title itself (I won't give that away), the biggest takeaway I had was the manner in which life lessons were woven into dialogues seamlessly. It almost felt like attending a motivational workshop beautifully disguised as a film. Kudos to the entire team for their creativity. 

Here are the top 8 life lessons, I had as my takeaways from the movie. 

1) Be Inspired : When Agostino first steps out of his car to help the boy, that moment is awe-inspiring. With the prior dialogues at a steady story-line, the unexpected revelation is nothing short of  a major turning point in the movie.

2) Don't let the Naysayers win : The taunts that Swapnil faces from his relatives reminds us to overcome negativity around. When Agostino illustrates how he does not let others define him or his capabilities, it is a reminder to all of us to never let labels define us. 

3) Take a Moment to help others: Helping the stranded boy reminds us to stop and look around as we journey through life too busy with our own pursuits. When Agostino says "It will be fun".. it is a lesson for busy individuals to stop and enjoy the small joys in life. 

4) Dream Big: When Agostinho dreams of his studio, we remember to keep dreaming.  Our fear of failures prevent us from dreaming the impossible. And yet Agostinho reminds us how we can visualize our future. How often do we limit ourselves and hesitate to dream big.

5) Success is a journey not a destination: When Swapnil walks off muttering about the real life book, he talks about how once the final goal is determined, the path is enjoyable. That is really a simple truth that we often forget. It is the pursuit of a goal that should give us limitless joy, not the outcome or result of the mission. 

6) Take small risks and if you follow your heart even God will help you: A lesson for all entrepreneurs hesitating to take the first step. Listen to a Podcast interview with New York Entrepreneur Nazia DeFrank for a perspective on the same topic. 

7) Keep Humor in your Life - The light moments in the movie- (The joke about stand on my own feet  etc.) add a dose of humor to the  topic of a differently abled person's life struggles. 

8) Find your true calling and follow your dreams : Despite Agostino being educated in one field he finds his true joy in a different career which  makes him successful; Swapnil's career choice reminds us of the proverbial underdog following his dreams. 

This is a Konkani language film but has English subtitles.  Watch Movie - This Book Will Change your Life  Overall the Concept was genius and congratulations to the entire cast and team for a well executed film.  Enjoy the film! 

Why we should Motivate each other?

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Inspiration comes in many forms.  Books, Movies, Leaders, and Nature are just a few of them. There are many great thinkers out there. Successful authors, speakers, youtubers, and podcasters. When there are already hundreds of sources of inspiration, do we really need to motivate each other? 

Yes, we do. And here is why. 

Reason 1) Being motivated by someone you know - Matters. When a person is going through a difficult time, it is unlikely for them to seek out a famous motivational speaker and be inspired. It is definitely possible but many times that action of seeking help does not come proactively because its already challenging to deal with the problem.  When I was in high school- the academic pressures were getting to me. At that point it was my dad who became the motivational speaker in my life. He introduced me to meditation and concepts of Emotional Intelligence. We all goes through ups and downs in our lives and during the moments I have been feeling low- I think with gratitude to those who motivated me. During the time that my mother was battling an illness that even took her life away, it was my family, relatives and friends who gave me the encouragement I needed.  Being motivated by those around you REALLY matters. 

Reason 2) Problems are on the Rise:  Just as inspiration is everywhere, problems are everywhere too.  At different times in history, different problems have been on the forefront. In the past it may have wars and the struggles to have the basic necessities of life like food, clothing and shelter.  But in today's world factors like self-esteem, self-worth and mental health have become the primary necessities. The pressures from social media. Easy access to various forms of addiction. Everyone including small kids face increasing levels of stress. As a society, we have increasing levels of  stress and mental health challenges. So the second reason we should motivate each other -is because today's problems are different than problems in the past and to counter the problems around we need strong forces of motivation.  This is the need of the hour. It is the solution for today's challenges. 

Reason 3) A small word could make a huge difference to someone else. During my early days of writing when I wasn't really sure if this was right path for me, I once took a  long break from blogging. A friend of mine, got angry at me and said - how can you stop writing -there could be people who are waiting to read what you write. That really meant something to me. Even a small word of appreciation may make a big difference  to someone else. It may increase their determination to achieve a goal. I remember each kid who sent out a note, appreciating my writing.  There will  be people who will either ignore those who are trying to do something new or even be pessimistic about it.  This lack of support may cause a sense of self doubt in the person trying to achieve a goal. That is when your word of encouragement can make a huge difference to them.  

Reason 4) When you motivate others, you strengthen yourself. When we motivate others, we reinforce those messages back to our own lives. Inspiration is something that we all need. If we are dealing with difficult times, personal grief, and health issues we need it even more.  Everyone knows positive quotes and stories. The question really is how much of our lives are dictated by those positive quotes.  When we share those positive thoughts and messages with others, the biggest audience is your own subconscious mind.  So when you motivate others, what you are really doing is motivating yourself. Isn't it amazing that a selfless act can have such a great reward.

So to recap, 4 reasons we must motivate each other.  
(1) Being motivated by someone you know matters to them. It means much more than a random message of motivation they may read on social media. 
(2) The big problems of today like self-doubt and mental health need a solution like motivation.
(3) A small word of motivation could make a huge difference.
(4)  When you motivate others, you reinforce that message to strengthen yourself. 
 

How to stay Motivated in this Pandemic

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Do you know how long the last pandemic lasted? The last pandemic was the 1918 Flu and it lasted two years.  Science has come a long way in the last 100 years so we can keep an active hope that this pandemic will end sooner. That a cure will be found faster and we will be on our road to normal.

While we have always had wars, natural calamities and important problems across the world, the challenges seem to just keep adding up this year. America had challenges with racism and wrongful deaths. Protests breaking out all over the country and then peaceful protestors being attacked. Floods, wildfires all happening around the world. The violent death of a nurse in Florida who had just finished her shift helping COVID patients.  Unexplainable suicide deaths, including a successful Indian movie star, that saddened a country of a billion people. The surreal videos of the blasts in Beirut, almost like a science fiction movie. Grim realities and difficult images that are hard to remove from your mind. No matter where you are, 2020 has been a very challenging year for all of us.

Our children are facing a very new challenge, one that we have never faced before. What is very important for us to realize that we as adults have never faced a pandemic in our childhood.

While we are facing important challenges, we must focus on how we can overcome these times. What can we learn, what can we teach and how we can grow. An easy way to remain motivated is to think of an Emotions we feel during this time ~ and then try to strengthen a Skill to combat that emotion.  The fun part of this list of skills is that they all start with the letter C – just like Covid and Corona and Calamities.  As we battle the fallouts of this difficult time- we may forget what we already know. This list serves as a reminder for all of us. We must understand the impacts of what we do today and the skills we build today, can shape the future of our children.

So, what are some of the important C-skills we must strive to teach and practice  during a global pandemic? What are the common emotions we feel and how can we strive to face this challenge? 

One of the common emotions we feel is Frustration. Dealing with the changes, the restrictions. Having to follow certain rules and guidelines. Losing our freedom. With this comes Uncertainty, Worry and Stress. This is a normal emotion we can feel just by reading all the media reports. We have real news and a constant stream of social media news that may or may not be true. Stress would be a general feeling of uneasiness, fear, worry or anguish. Skill Number 1 we need to practice to combat stress is Calmness. Practice destressing.  Make your list of activities that reduce your stress. Each person has their own checklist. For some it maybe Prayer, Yoga, Singing, Cooking, Reading, Taking walks but the overarching skill is – Practice destressing – consciously and passionately. When you are stressed, practice Calmness. 

Being stressed is a general issue. Most people face it and one can handle it by consciously addressing it with a regular commitment to actively indulge in activities that reduce stress. But another Emotion or challenge that is increasingly becoming common during this time is -sadly Depression -This is a higher level than just general stress.   In this age of social distancing and restrictions it is easily possible for someone who is borderline depressed to quickly move into more serious depression. With so much of negative events happening, each time we read bad news we get pushed more and more into feeling at loss. If you have lost hope, you can definitely recognize signs of depression and you must speak up and talk this out with someone. Do not suffer alone. If you are hesitant to speak to a professional, that’s okay – reach out to a friend or a family member.  Skill number 2 we need to practice is Communication ~ Identify your support system and actively engage with them. Don’t be ashamed to share how you feel because there are several people out there who feel the same way. Be honest with yourself and talk about what bothers you. Having that support system and relying on it will go a long way in helping you bounce back.  And if you do not have any single friend or family member that you can confide in -you must absolutely seek professional help. So when you are depressed practice Communication. 

Another Emotion we are dealing with is Brain drain. Now that we are not engaging in a lot of activities we used to do before, there could be a general sense of brain drain, losing out on stuff, feeling lazy, particularly in children since they are out of many of their regular activities. Skill 3 we must practice is Creativity. At the start of the lockdowns we had a flurry of baking and cooking -but now a lot of that has tapered down. Keep yourself busy with new avenues of Creativity.  Staying busy will definitely help us combat this time productively and happily. When you are bored, practice Creativity  

And finally – another emotion we feel is losing control of the situation. The skill that help us alleviate this feeling is Skill 4- Compassion.  We cannot control how we automatically feel about this situation,  we can actively engage in helping spread positivity and compassion to others. The more you engage in making others feel better, you will feel better. So seek out opportunities to help others. Maybe its just a friendly chat, a phone call or video call, or just making a family member feel better. An easy way to get out of our own bubble of frustration, worry, stress, loss of hope, is to practice making others feel better. It is a guaranteed skill that will empower you to feel better. When you feel hopeless practice Compassion.

  

There are several studies now on the psychological and long-term mental health impacts of the pandemic. But each time mankind has faced a challenge we have come out stronger. As a recap, the C -skills we need during a pandemic 

When you feel stressed – practice Calmness

When you feel depressed – practice Communication

When you feel bored – practice Creativity ;

When you feel helpless, practice Compassion

  

Let us all work together to life our spirits and empower those around us as well. 

How To overcome the Writer's Block

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The Writer’s Block is the term associated with losing the ability to write, after having written for some time. It is estimated that many aspiring, as well as established writers can go through this phase at some point of time in their writing career.

What was my Writer’s Block? After being published in 2004 in Chicken Soup for the Soul series, I received fan-mail from several children in the United States, India and Europe. The Indian kids were very excited about a story by an Indian author. It felt great, but then I didn’t write again for a while. A few years later, Chicken Soup republished the story in the Best of Chicken Soup... edition and I should have been encouraged enough to write more. But questions that kept coming to my mind were - what do I write about? And is this really meant for me? How do I find time? So, I did not write anything for three to four years. I always had the desire to write but just  never got to doing it. Since at least some of you may have gone through this feeling or have a Writer’s block to begin with - How can we Overcome the Writer's Block?

Here are five easy steps

Step 1) Call yourself a Writer: Here is a tough question. Do you call yourself a writer? Writing was not a  major source of income for me.  I had an existing career already and I defined myself by that.  It felt odd, perhaps a little arrogant to call myself a “writer”.  Then I read an article about published and unpublished writers. “Unpublished writer,” that sounded inspirational.

So if you do not have a lot of published work to your credit, but still have the drive within you, you could start by calling yourself an unpublished writer. Just saying it aloud feels like you have this treasure trove of ideas, waiting to be written on paper and then be published eventually. Believe you are a writer. When somebody asks if you write, say with confidence – Yes. Don’t be dismissive. Humility is a virtue, but self- confidence is empowering. The difference for me was monumental. From being a person who occasionally dabbled in writing, calling myself a writer inspired me tremendously and helped me overcome my block. 

Step 2) Practice writing: Use every opportunity that comes your way to contribute your stories to. Put together your first draft. Read it and rewrite it. When you go through any emotional experience, write down how you feel at that time. Make mental notes and go back and spend a few minutes writing. As it is said a bad piece of writing is always better than a blank page. 

Step 3) Share your writing: Have it read by your own honest board of critics. Mine consists of my children, my sister and my friends. They both quickly point out anything they don’t like. Feedback is a major part of any writer's journey. Find a critiques group and join it. I found mine through SCBWI -Society of Children's Book Writers. My critiques group is a group of authors who give me feedback on my writing.  

4) Do not worry about the Competition: There will always successful writers out there. Do not compare yourself to other writers or their success. Instead your goal should be to better than yourself.  Make friends with other authors. Make them your support system and be their support system as well. 

5) Take Failure out of your dictionary : If writing is something you want to do as well then, jump up enthusiastically and launch your career. You can decide if any failure you encounter is really a stumbling block or a stepping stone to your future success. Write as therapy for yourself. Write to share your life experience.  Even if folks are lukewarm .. at least your journey has started.  You may not yet have any best-selling publication to your credit, but that doesn’t mean it is not in store for you in the future.  J

So to repeat the 5 steps to Overcome the Writer's Block - 

(1) Be bold and you call yourself a Writer.  

(2) Practice Writing as much as you can.

(3) Share your Writing and accept feedback.

(4) Don't worry about the competition

(5) Take Failure out of your Dictionary. 

Why South-Asian Americans should say #blacklivesmatter

 South-Asian Americans, this is your struggle too!

When there is an uncomfortable or unsettling topic on hand, we all like to live in denial. When COVID deaths were reported initially, I heard countless people ask -what underlying conditions did the person have? We all prefer to live in a world where we are not vulnerable. We prefer to believe we are not susceptible to the dangers or the injustice around us.

The peaceful protests all over the country were supported by people of all color. The voices of the second-generation South-Asian Americans were clear and visible. The first generation Americans chose to be partly silent with just a few voices voicing their support. Part of the reason the first generation maybe quiet is because we have culturally been raised to not question the establishment. When one ethnicity or minority is discriminated against, at times the other person of color (POC) lives in this belief that this is not about them.

South-Asians need to understand that the next George Floyd or Breona Taylor could very well be them or their loved one. There is video proof of George Floyd’s death. There is video proof of Amy Cooper threatening an African American man. How many deaths of other POC have occurred with families wondering why and how it happened? And then there are also known cases of racial aggression against South-Asians.

Let us not forget Srinivas Kuchibotla who died after being shot at, at a bar in Kansas because he of how he “looked”. Let’s not forget the Indian grandfather Sureshbhai Patel who was assaulted because he looked “suspicious”. Numerous people of color have been viewed with suspicion because of their religion and their skin.

As South-Asian Americans, if you think you or your children are immune because your are financially stable, have a job and an education, there needs to be more dialog. For a racist, who cannot accept anyone who looks different than him or her, it does not matter what shade of brown your skin is. Light-brown, Lighter-brown, dark-brown, peach ..it just does not matter. You are still different, you are still vulnerable.

Your children are watching your reactions and what you say much more than you realize. This is a vulnerable time for them. The pandemic is not over yet, their last 3 months of school were just snatched away from them, they never got to say good-bye to most of their friends and now they see the country erupting in protests and peaceful protestors being attacked as well. This is the time to have dialogs at home and talk about racial equality. This is not the time to look away and pretend like everything is normal. 

Let us not forget the Civil Rights movement that allowed immigration. Indian American, let us not forget that, Mahatma Gandhi led India to freedom from British colonization by his non-violent peaceful protests. This is not a new struggle for you.  This is the time to lend your voice and join the movement. This isn’t just someone else’s fight. 

Gandhi said, “Be the Change you wish to see in the world” ….. It is now time to “Come out of your bubble and Wish for that change in the world. This is totally about you too!”

How to Stay Motivated through what we have learned in History

We have been living in alternate reality for the last few months. The old normal, intermediate normal, new normal… It’s all been a crazy ride. First it started with a challenging virus hitting parts of the world and the rest of the world thought it was safe… and then it became a global pandemic. For the first time in our lives, simple things we took for granted were taken away. We could not meet up with our friends, everything was shutdown, even grocery visits were limited. We swayed from cooking crazes, eating binges , exercising with fury, picking new skills, enjoying family time, racing through Netflix and waiting for the lockdown to lift. We thought it was the most challenging time of our lives….

And then 2020 had something new to throw at us. A bigger challenge than most of us have ever faced… A reality check that we live in a world where a human life can just be taken away… like it wasn’t human. While we always knew of innocent deaths in the past and protests have always been around...there was nothing as startling and unsettling as the video of a life being taken away. It served as a wake-up call for many.

And then we saw protests nationwide and what was even harder to deal with was … peaceful protests being disrupted. The pandemic suddenly seemed much easier to deal with, then watching peaceful protestors being attacked.

And yet, we have prevailed through more difficult times in our history. History was my least favorite subject. As a kid I would wonder why we had to learn and memorize about all these facts from the past, when we could be spend that time learning Science. The next great invention could come from that and benefit the whole world. What good can History really bring, I would ponder. 

And yet today, History is probably our best healer! It can and should inspire us to thrive and prevail. We must remember the struggles that mankind has had and how we have overcome all that.  Leaders like Dr. King remind us to “Dream” … Writers, dreamers, poets like Maya Angelou remind us to “Rise”. History has countless voices that have inspired generations to speak up, to march, to lead. India was under the colonial British for nearly 200 years before Britain resigned to the non-violent protests of Mahatma Gandhi. Nelson Mandela had been in prison for 27 years before apartheid left South Africa… The great leaders of the past worked tirelessly to create the freedom we have today! We did progress and we did create real change. And while things may look bleak, there is still hope.

And we can still thanks Science for the internet and social media. People are sharing information at a rapid pace, inspiring each other to stand up and speak up. People are ignoring even social distancing guidelines and filling the streets. Liberty , Justice and the Right to live without fear.. That’s the simple ask…And while it may stress you day in and day out to see America in crisis … go down your memory lane and think of your favorite leader from your History book.. to heal you, to inspire you and motivate you to look forward to a brighter future!

And if it helps, just type away too. To stay positive! Remember the pen that was mightier than the sword …. The keyboard is the mighty pen of today! #blacklivesmatter #keepwriting #justice #peace

It's not Political ~ #blacklivesmatter

Friendship Poem~ The joy of being able to be who you are...

              Is your Heart on Your Sleeve?

By Lin Thomas

Time to celebrate or grieve

Wear your heart on your sleeve

Just put it out there

Be courageous and share

Find your sounding boards

Your dead letter boxes

Who don’t judge you

Just motivate and pull you through

Those true friends that care   

With them, your heart on your sleeve you can wear

You can express what you feel

Your soul can heal

You can laugh or appear like a fool

Cos you are your own definition of cool

You can be... who you are

Doesn't matter if you are a moon or a star 

Express your thoughts... fearlessly

Wear your heart on your sleeve, in all honesty

What naysayers think ...it doesn't matter

But how you feel, it's what really matters

This is World War III. Civilians... Stay Sane & do what you can.

Make no mistake, we are in World War III. This is not one country against another but all of us against the big invisible enemy. The one that cannot be seen with night vision goggles. The COVID-19 pandemic has impacted the majority of human population on the planet in one way or the other. The first responders, medical community, law enforcement officers are the heroes, call them the military or armed forces ..they are the ones fighting the enemy. They are battling on the frontlines, treating and helping the covid-19 affected patients in the ICUs and hospitals around the world. And the rest of us if you are not on the front line, you are a civilian.    

Ten Ways Civilians can Help

(1) STOP Complaining: If you identify yourself as a civilian and you are not hit by the virus, you are NOT the one suffering. We are the people who have the safety of our homes, while those on the frontline save lives, putting themselves at risk. Memes and forwards have been flooding the social media and clearly folks are having a hard time managing to work remotely, keeping the kids occupied, keeping sane and get essential groceries. But hold on, all your troubles are nothing compared to the people on the front line. 

(2) Rally behind those who can build medical supplies NOW... If you know a business that can manufacture the much needed equipment or gear that the medical community needs, this is the biggest crisis of the hour. We have spent billions on our defense budgets over the years.. this is no different and needs attention immediately. How can the heroes help save lives if they cannot protect their own lives. Period! So whether you are a business owner, a government leader, an influencer, a celebrity, a millionaire or a billionaire.. act NOW to use your influence to get the much needed masks, respirators, gowns and kits to the medical community asap.  

(3) Support the researchers trying to find a cure ~ If you know a researcher or you are in a position to support one, this is the only way this war will end. We can control the spread but we need an answer for those who are already impacted. 

(4) Stay Home - Buy online so you can limit your trips to the grocery and unless your job is essential, please stay home. Let me say it again, STAY HOME even if you do not have symptoms. That is the only way to flatten the curve as you may have heard at least a 100 times this week. 

(5) Conserve food and resources purchased already ~ While you may have the capacity to buy as much as you wish, many resources and essentials are getting out of stock. So conserve it so you don't need to replenish it soon. Someone else who needs it can get the essentials and grocery, if you are not sweeping things off the shelves. 

(6) Spread useful and verified information. Don't spread panic. If you have information from reliable sources that is helpful, please share. We are flooded with memes and humor so it would help if folks can tag their posts as HUMOR or INFO. This way people who need a light hearted moment can view the humor videos and the others who are looking only for info can view that.  

(7) Don't worry about your child's distance learning: The biggest education you can give your child now, is how we deal with this global crisis. Help them see things in perspective. How they can view themselves as lucky because they have a home, food and are safe. Help teach them to conserve resources. The educators will figure out distance learning. This is not what parents need to do. This is the time for parents to speak kind words to their children, reassure them and help them build the grit to handle the stress that this unprecedented crisis has unleashed on the world.    

(8) Stop binge eating NOW~ When isolation first started for all of us, I took my diet seriously and lost a few pounds. However, when the first death was announced in our school district, it had me stressed out that and I unknowingly started eating for 10 minutes. When things hit close, there will be stress. Find other avenues to reduce stress. Whether it is prayer, meditation, reading, exercising, organizing, boost your immunity, and pick up a new skill. Anything that is a stress buster for you.. just do it.   

(9) Stop Conspiracy Theorizing : It's not going to help. We need a solution to the problem right now.    

(10) Do not question your faith.  This month is a perfect opportunity for all the naysayers to ask .. Where is God?  As we see the death tolls rising in US cities, coffins piling in Italy, the Pope himself tearful ..and all religious gatherings and prayer services cancelled.... even the faithful could pause and ask the question.. where are you God? Please rescue us from this epidemic. And yet, God is in our midst. As we have always known.. God lives inside each one of us.. God appears in the form of humans.. None of this is new... Look around and you will find God. Our medical workers who forge ahead with limited equipment and try to rescue lives, putting their own lives in danger. God lives in them. In our good reporters who seek to spread information and not panic. In our medical researchers who are racing against time to find a cure. And the Satan lives around too. In the form of hoarders who have hoarded medical equipment and sanitizers in the hope of making a quick buck. In the form of fear mongers who are seeking to spread chaos and sensationalism. 

This is the time our faith must be strong. Just like in the battlefield, we have to fight this enemy. When Mother Theresa went to the leprosy stricken areas of Calcutta, the disease did not affect her. Leprosy was a very contagious disease but she helped the sick and the suffering and it was a miracle that she did not get affected. She was proclaimed as the living saint. May the medical workers of today, also be protected from Covid-19 the same way. 

We must keep ourselves sane during this tryst. As we traverse through this super stressful time, and remote workers all over the world battle with keeping their sanity within the walls of their home, pause for a second... we are civilians... and the people on the front-line need us all to rally behind them. 

Five Steps to Be a Passionate Writer

Do you have the desire to write? Have you always wished you had more time to write? Has it been several years since you last wrote?

This past year, when people have talked to me about my book or stories, I have discovered that there are several people in our own DC Metro area who may have a lot of hidden talent. Some people mentioned they have written during their college days. Some love to write, but have not been able to do so, or not had the time. Since you are reading this article, we can assume you may have some motivation to write. If you like to write and hoped you did it more, what is it that is holding you back? 

Here are Five Steps to become a passionate writer..

1) Finding the Topic.. what can one write about? Find a central theme.

This article is not intended to be a guide on writing.  However, I would like to share my experience on how I have transformed into a more focused aspiring writer. Reading definitely provides inspiration, but it should be done as a hobby to gain perspectives and increase your knowledge. It should not be done right before you embark on a writing mission yourself. I believe reading other articles just before writing can prevent creativity from flowing naturally. Instead take inspiration from real life events. Think of subjects that are close to your heart. Talk to people; write how you feel in certain situations. Think of any message you want to convey.  Once you have an idea that you feel strongly about, words will flow automatically.

What is the biggest takeaway you want your readers to have?
Once you have a central theme, the task gets much easier. Think about what is close to your heart.

2) Find the right atmosphere
Don’t sit in front of the blank computer screen or paper and try to think of ideas. Instead take a walk and reflect on what you want to say. Perhaps make small notes. Find a favorite spot that you can write comfortably and feel inspired.

3) Think of your audience: 

Who is your audience? Decide whom you are writing for and write what they would like to read. My past projects were catered to specific segments, my favorite being young children and middle- grade readers. I have written for young children but my next goal is to write non-fiction for adults. 

4) Finding the time

Time will never come by easily. Time has to be made. If you are really determined, you will be able to accommodate it. I thought I never had time too, but I took the plunge. 

5) Reflect, think and be motivated:
How do you know you are inspired enough? For one thing, you will be clicking and clacking on your keyboard furiously. You will feel the adrenaline flow, like a runner nearing the finish line. How wonderful it feels when one completes the task.

(This article has been updated from an original article by the author, published in the Kerala digest 2012)  

Balancing Work, Life and the Gym ~ Lin Thomas

(Published  in Tharakam 2014, published as part of the 26th Annual Jimmy George Volleyball Tournament hosted by Baltimore Washington Kings)

  Constantly juggling your family, career, errands and kid’s activities? Ladies out there, does that sound like your day to day life?  Does the day just get by you? Have any of you been trying to get some exercise added into your busy schedules? I am sure there are some of you who are regulars at your local gym but not me. My best friend in high school was an avid regular at our local gym in Goa and she kept coaxing me to join her. I was amongst the vast majority of Indian girls, for whom “working out” at the gym isn’t exactly a top priority.

Flash forward to the present time, as a mom of two young kids, I decided to turn a new leaf.  Few months ago, I zeroed in on ‘Zumba’ classes at the local gym. I procrastinated for two days, and 7.40 PM class on Thursday was my last chance for the week.   After a busy day of meetings at work and juggling project schedules, I reached home. I dillydallied till 7.20 and suddenly realized I would be late. I raced to the gym and explained at the front desk why I was there. They asked me if I had been to that gym before, to which I said no. It suddenly dawned on me that this was the first time I was actually IN a gym. I felt odd, almost embarrassed; how could I have never visited a gym before. As I had constantly heard about the gym from my friend as I grew up and my hubby is a member of the same gym, it seemed like I knew forever what a gym was. It just struck me that I had never actually even been on a guest pass.  

Everybody at the gym seemed extremely fit and looked great. The next thought that came to my mind was how unprepared I was. I was wearing a regular T-shirt not a sports one. I was carrying my hand bag not a sports sac.  I did not even have a water bottle in hand. What was I thinking? One look at me and it would seem like I had come to buy groceries.  I hoped that no one who knew me would spot me. 

After the formalities the manager walked me over to the Zumba class. The class had already begun. I found a spot at the very back corner so almost no one could see me. In fact, my spot was not even visible in the gigantic mirror on the wall. I didn’t want to look at myself. The music was in full swing and I joined in with the steps. The first few minutes were extremely hard and it felt almost surreal. The few girls around me looked like models out of a sports magazine. Slowly, I surveyed the rest of the room and spotted plenty of women in all shapes and sizes. I heaved a sigh of relief and continued. Upbeat Latino music was playing and slowly I started getting a little comfortable.  After the first five minutes it started getting a little easier. My salsa dance steps from a community class five years ago started returning to my memory. In my mind, I thanked the Senorita dance moves from a prior KAGW program three years ago.  My steps seemed to be getting into the rhythm and my confidence levels began to rise. In ten minutes I dared to move slightly to the left and see myself in the mirror. I relaxed a little as I realized I was not THE most awkward in the class. This was far better than getting four stars in ‘Everybody Dance’ on the PS3 at home. The synergy of the folks around me encouraged me to keep going.  I wasn’t here to win a dance contest and the best part was it was a lot of fun.

After my initial hang-ups and embarrassment, I reached a point where I didn’t want the class to end. Folks were guzzling Gatorade and ice-water. I had to make do with occasional breaks to the water fountain, but it was still okay. I was still having fun. The entire workout lasted an hour. The adrenaline was flowing through me; I was feeling refreshed and energized. For the next class I decided I wouldn’t be a newbie. I would be more prepared.  I got a sleek looking water bottle and some brand sports gear for the next class. The classes were fun and I kept making it for a minimum of two classes per week for few months. I also kept adding to my gym wardrobe and life seemed great.

My hypothesis (illustrated below) is that in life, many of us have a determination cycle. We start off with a goal feeling determined, work hard and feel pride when we accomplish it. Then complacency sets in and then we spiral back at square one. 

(Disclaimer: The illustration has been created by the author and is not from any self-help or behavioral trainer’s book. It is purely the author’s perspective and is not scientifically proven in studies and is not patented yet. After creating this illustration, the author did google search it to check if this brainwave has occurred to others and it seems like it has not.  :-) )

So my determination cycle to go to the gym then began its downward stretch. New job responsibilities, some more chauffeuring to kid activities and Old Man Winter hits Virginia. Do you blame me if I decide to hibernate away from the gym during winter? How can one go for the 7.40 PM class when daylight is gone by 4 PM?   So I relinquished the desire to keep up with the classes and slowly got so lazy that I stopped going. But hey guess what… Spring is here.  According to the determination cycle, it is time for me to turn a new leaf. I just heard they started Bollywood Jam classes. It is time for me to put away those winter sweaters and get all the Puma and Nike stuff out. Neighborhood gym, watch out… here I come. No more excuses – at least for a few months.

How I learned the Joys of Public Transportation

~Lin Thomas

Faced with the prospect of my next project being in Washington DC, I mumbled and grumbled about the idea of having to use public transportation to get to work. And my hubby made it a special point to be gleeful about it. Come on!! , he said, it’s cool to be working in DC. You can travel by the metro, sip a Starbucks and read the news paper. .Isn’t that awesome !!

Besides the fact that eating & drinking is not allowed on the metro and more importantly, Starbucks isn’t my favorite brand, I just couldn’t digest the fact that I would have to give up the comfort of my car and travel in the snow and rain by train and bus!!

I dragged myself to the Park & Ride close to home and boarded the bus that would take me to the nearest station. I have a 20 minute non stop bus ride and then a 20 minute train ride to work. I slowly began to realize that it wasn’t as bad as I had anticipated. In fact, it was pretty relaxing. I found a cozy seat on the train and began reading the newspaper I had picked. I realized that I actually read it, instead of scanning it as I would have at home. Suddenly my fears seemed unfounded. I looked around at all the friendly faces and it dawned on me that here I was traveling to work, not worried about the traffic on the beltway ,not worried about the car that rudely cut in front of me or the sulky driver behind honking at me. I was actually relaxing!!   Isn’t that a luxury few can afford on the way to a dreary day at work?

Traveling by the metro instills in you an unusual reality check. The young CEO and the day laborer paid the same ticket and enjoyed the same status in a metro. There was this unusual sense of camaraderie amongst the passengers. As day went by I began to love my travel all the more. I got time to catch up on my reading, listen to music, plan a party and also be updated on the latest fashion trends thanks to the fashion divas who board the train once you enter the ‘District of Columbia’.

Public transportation offers you many choices. It offers you some time to reflect and analyze the life around you and be more in touch with people from different walks of life. You can make some friends, solve some puzzles or even catch up on some sleep lost due to a late night movie.

Talking about sleep, it is not the best thing to do if you are a deep sleeper. You might have to get a ride back to the station you missed or better still miss out on some interesting happenings. One fine day as my bus went down the Dulles Toll-free Road, a co-passenger decided to take a snooze. Let’s call him Sleepyhead.  Our new driver who was obviously unfamiliar with the roads forgot to take exit into the parallel road that leads to our exit. Once you miss that road there’s no turning back. It takes you straight to the Dulles airport. None of us realized something was amiss until we began to see some unfamiliar buildings. The first thought was that we had got into the wrong bus. All of us turned to each other and said where are we going? Everyone looked really amused. If you are familiar with the Dulles airport roads you’ll know that you need to travel quite a bit till you can actually get back to the highway in the opposite direction. Add to that some construction work and we really did have a joy ride. Sleepyhead was blissfully unaware of all what was happening. After a good 15 minutes ride through all the new construction in the Dulles area we were on our way back. This time our driver did not make a mistake and we were on our exit ramp. Everyone in the bus began clapping, reminiscent of the days when planes landed successfully post 9/11. Sleepyhead woke up with all the commotion and really looked confused seeing that the 30 other passengers were all clapping on the bus. He looked around and everything looked just the same as it did every day. The look of confusion on his face was a sight worth savoring for me as a bus rider. Don’t you agree now that public transportation has its own share of fun and advantages.

(Published in Kerala Digest 2004)
(The author continues to work in Washington Dc and the love-hate relationship with public transportation  continues.... 8 years and counting :-)..)